Welcome to "We once were human too" my second published collection of poetry that dives deeper into the matters pertaining to my heart and soul. When a person is incarcerated, it is a constant internal struggle to find and maintain self-worth in an environment where we are often treated as "less Than", regardless of how much we have changed for the better. Despite having taken different paths in life, we once were human too.
BELOW, PLEASE FIND A SELECTION OF POEMS FROM "WE ONCE WERE HUMAN TOO"
DEPARTMENT OF CORRUPTION
Good Evening!
And welcome to our wonderful world of whites and grays, I’m sure you’ll be quite amazed at how quickly your inner light will fade, we’ll “Transform” you without Michael Bay; so…
Just step right this way and let’s start this process; I’ll chart your progress as you get drained of life; we’ll detain your rights, exchange what remains in your veins with ice and inject you with a double dose of pain and strife, then you’ll get sprayed for lice.
Sir, please remove your watch; as…
CO’s who’ve forgot that they’re not super-cops gather in groups to gawk as you strip nude and squat, then we’ll give you…
Old clothes with used boots and socks before you’re fed expired fruit and slop that’s been scooped from pots; and…
Don’t be afraid to take a bite even though many maggots have been mistaken for grains of rice in a kitchen invaded day and night by parades of mice, and in Canteen?
Proactive thoughts are back in stock, but we’ve raised the price because we designed this for the blinded line of mindless guys who haven’t realized with pride that they are diamonds in the rough; so, they’ve…
Resigned and given up, that’s when they’re finally shipped to us; and…
The label of “offender” is what we exchange your name with; and…
Here’s a plastic container to place your brain in while we erase this space where your face is and replace it with a modified dollar sign…
YES! We LOVE to make you do a lot of time for the smallest crimes; we’ve got to find more ways to distract you while we tax and detach you from the world you wish to get back to; keeping you trapped in a capsule of depression and despair…
-sniff sniff-
Can you smell that?
The scent of spiritual death is in the air…
The Department of Corruption; correction isn’t there, so I don’t really know what you expect to get repaired; because HERE? We only patch up aggression through disrespect, neglect, and lack of affection; so actual progressiveness is rare, because we’ve almost perfected our methods used to tear down those, we keep in our warehouse that’s overcrowded from not letting the ones stuck in there out; and…
Every day they’re faced with harassment; this place is just massive, and they will grow stagnant within its units; which is why it’s no mistake that they’re fashioned in the shape of a casket,
We want you to DIE here,
AM I CLEAR?
Welcome to the DOC…
IMAGINING FOREVER
You are appreciated…
Our troubles aren’t over yet, but to me. We made it; you will be the mother of my firstborn; and…
I’ve discovered that, in the worst storm, your love is like a warm sweater with an umbrella popped; or…
A cool breeze when the weather’s hot; or…
Like when Martin Luther met Coretta Scott; it was destiny; because…
You’re still that ride-or-die right by my side; and we haven’t always seen eye-to-eye, but let’s agree that you bring out the best in me and the recipe to success, the key, lies in our hearts’ connection; you’re…
More valuable than any sculpture or art collection, because even when I was headed in a dark direction towards this plantation they call “Corrections”, I never lost affection from you; and…
The child you’ll birth will be our reflection; it’s true, you ARE perfection…
At least to me…
And if what we share would cease to be? My heart would be broken and buried under deep debris by the largest explosion originating beneath the sea that would reach its peak when it touched the sky; but…
We haven’t built the bond that we’ve achieved for it just to die, so I want to thank you for helping us survive the test of time; and…
When God created you? He used His best design; and…
Even though we haven’t reached the top and have more steps to climb…
This, to me? is best defined as victory; and…
If I could press rewind on history?
I’d still spend the rest of my days…
Imagining forever…
With you…
#8 For The Marathon… (A Tribute…)
I don’t know what’s gotten a hold of me…
The pain is comfortable now, but that’s not how it’s supposed to be; my heart became numb
then froze; I’ve been told that I’m similar to ‘Pac with the poetry; prolific, so gifted; but I know
Kendrick would say, “Rashad, be humble”; and…
In this concrete jungle advancement is my only option, I won’t retreat, because I made my own
life Hell, so I felt like leaves in the Autumn; all I’ve seen is the bottom, so I won’t stop until the
top is below my feet; I…
Need to get the next level unlocked, and I know the key lies within; I claim to hate this cell, but
I’ll continue to get placed in jail until I decide to win; I’m weak now from my mind being beat
down, but I WILL RISE AGAIN; and…
My demons saw what happened to me, and they all took advantage; but when I sprung back to
my feet? They “got shook and vanished” like an Etch-a-Sketch.
It’s time to rebuild…
Rashad? Yea, he’s ILL; someone tell the Professor, yes, I’m the REAL Weapon X; lyrically I’ll still
catch some wreck because I don’t do second-best; these…
Fearful fools with phony facades are the only ones I expect to flex, so I don’t detect a threat
just work more and say less as they continued trying to mentally play chess with a checker set
and…
After I left the nest? I got lost in the streets because I’d fallen asleep; I abandoned myself and
tried to play the hand I was dealt, but didn’t inspect the deck; so…
Coming to prison was the direct affect, now my sanity’s vanishing, I could probably collect a
check; but…
In life? Every stage will test the flesh; and even though I made this mess, I’m blessed and
remain focused even when they say it’s hopeless; because if I stayed depressed and stressed?
I’d never meet my goals; and…
In this contest to keep my soul? The race is neck and neck between low and high; to society I
owe a debt and they want the next installment; all because I’ve been crawling when I was
supposed to fly; and…
I thought it was true love when I found my ex, but I now regret the dreams that I chose to buy.
Stuck in the dark, she’d also sold the sky but never told me why; so instead of trying to expose
her lies? I just closed my eyes; but…
Eventually the spark was lost; then, when my heart was crossed? I hoped to die, because the
pain was INTENSE; she broke it, so I ended up obtaining a wrench and hammer to fix the frame
then commenced to bang out the dents; and…
Life seems to be a game, in a sense; so, when I swing? I’m trying to aim for the fence; but My
lower self tends to pop up when he pleases carrying a box stuffed with diseases and won’t
leave until each strain is dispensed; and…
#8 For The Marathon… (A Tribute…) By Rashad El
Page | 2
Once I become infected? I start thinking thoughts that are dumb and reckless, but I’m
remaining convinced that with discipline I can quarantine these foreign things and contain them
in tents before they change into actions; and…
My higher self could have been further up the road, but I’d stopped briefly just to doze, and
now my devil is gaining some traction, and my faith has faltered so all that remains is a fraction
of what I once had; but I’m not giving up; every hurdle on this track will get hopped; and I might
have slowed down, but never actually stopped; because I…
Can’t allow myself to go back to the block with a stash at the spot; wanting cash and cars; no
basketball, but old homies would try to “pass me the rock”; I used to love the fast grind, but last
time I got snatched by the cops. I didn’t get back out; and…
After ten years of prison and pat downs while I’m at chow, what would possibly possess me to
pick up a pack NOW?
As a matter of fact, you can keep your trap house and your street cred, because taking that
route I would be dead or hit with time; so, as I see the finish line, I dash with haste and pat My
face with a damp towel as my weak legs carry me the rest of the way; because…
Even though I feel fatigued, I still proceed to pump and lift these muscles; my mindset matches
Nipsey’s hustle because my success is at stake; and…
Onlookers are impressed with my pace as I continue to conquer the old me, and in honor of
Kobe the number on my vest is an 8 for the marathon, as I end my trek in first place…
Ensuring that my soul is protected and safe…
As I prepare for the next challenge…
AMERICAN NEGRO
Who am I?
One of this country’s first creations…
My hard work is what birthed this nation, it was formed from the tears, blood and sweat of
people considered less than equal; and…
Throughout the years, we’ve continued to experience how it feels, but its chronology dates
back to when we were considered property, and sick debauchery left our women stripped of
modesty; and…
Freedom only came to those willing to risk the odyssey; our history was stolen; the government
wanted to commit a robbery, then create an illusion without trick photography that caused us
to…
Hate ourselves; this Willie Lynch psychology was first engrained during slavery; they made Me;
and after all this time? The curse remains; because…
Back then? We were restrained from birth with chains, and the worst of names and racial slurs
were heard exclaimed by “Massa” with a smirk as shame reverberated through the devastated
families that got separated as they saw those who could do the most work exchanged for cash.
we were…
Treated like dirt, then trained to pass on the oppression; they hoped the self-bondage would
halt our progression as they created a new plantation department, then called it “Corrections”.
and…
Towards my own race is where I focus all this aggression, painting an ugly picture through the
art of expression; I’m selfish…
I don’t want unity, just a lot of possessions; but if we kept our money in the community? It
would probably cause a recession; so…
I’d rather spend mass amounts on designer names that I can’t pronounce while they laugh and
count the cash I spend; and the projects were no accident; the object was to trap us in; with…
Everyone trying to push weight like they’re at the gym; peddling crack to thin dope-fiends; My
trigger finger’s itching, so please don’t lean on or scratch my Benz; I’m strapped so I won’t get
jacked again, I’ll clap whoever tries to snatch my rims; because I…
Hate my dark complexion, but can’t detach my skin, so I’ll just take it out on anybody who’s
considered black; Cause then they can repeat the cycle; and…
Hopefully? Your kids can be just like you and reach for rifles instead of books and backpacks.
I’m a…
Disease that has successfully infected a nation; and after a few tweaks and test innovations, I’ll
cook a fat batch then pass that to the next generation of crooks who blast gats; and…
The streets are cold, the slums are vicious; I love getting the youth to become addicted to
things that provide pain, and their collective mind-frame should be hooked to laugh tracks,
because their self-hatred makes them throw away everything that should be held sacred; I
mean, let’s face it; with…
American Negro… By Rashad El
Page | 2
Pops locked away and momma working two jobs to pay rent, the child’s mind is left naked, so I
recruited TV along with movies and their favorite type of music to help make this mentality,
because…
Once you dissect the core of something? You can begin to break its anatomy; and some might
say it’s a tragedy, but I say I’m the best thing the U.S. has ever made; even better than
Chevrolets…
Who am I?
The American Negro…
YOU DON'T WANT THIS HEART
Excuse me…
Ma’am?
I’m sorry to bother you, and I know it’s awfully rude of me to just pop up out the blue…
But you don’t want this heart…
I’ve come back to retrieve it…
No, it’s not that I actually need it; but you’d have to agree this deal was too much of a steal, so
what I’m here to do is be real with you; because I told the most vicious of lies; yes, it was
described on the bill as new, but I feel the truth is necessary: It’s suffered some breaks from
love that was fake, and each connection was another mistake; but it felt like I could never get
enough on my plate, and the poison’s presence was too subtle to taste; so, I…
Indulged and I ate, stuffing my face; but these weren’t meals of food; my table appeared to be
filled with fruit, but once peeled into? They revealed abuse; and even though I’d hoped it would
end, each scar was busted open again before I could fully heal the bruise, and it stung; so…
Eventually the damage done was too severe to use what you now hold in your hands; so, I wrote
up a plan to have it sold, as a scam; once it was cut and replaced; then stuffed in a crate after
being covered in paint to conceal the glue.
But trust me, you don’t want this heart…
Lady, it’s a mess; it’s been twisted, stretched, and convoluted; plus, batteries are not included; I
fought many times and lost to cupid, then did things that other people thought were stupid all
in the name of love; and I’m ashamed; it was a vampire whose fangs were stuck in my veins, it
sucked ‘til it drained my blood; and…
My heart became a rug; ragged and stained with mud, but the pain contained a drug that
chained me up so I grew addicted to the flames I touched and clung to them for dear life
because I don’t know what anything else feels like, so I still might go back to the anguish…
Just for old time’s sake…
Because that is the language I know well; I guess I’m too disturbed, because I keep a room
reserved at Heartbreak Hotel; and usually damaged goods are something I don’t sell.
So, you don’t want this heart…
I know you probably saw the package and got ecstatic; then thought,
“I’ve gotta have it!”
But the warranty for return-delivery’s expired; plus, it comes with some assembly required and
a lot of baggage; so, it’s already problematic, and I’m sorry for my deception…
You Don’t Want This Heart… By Rashad El
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What I sold you has been neglected; but if you’re interested, I also have a nice collection of
dreams and wooden nickels at bargain prices; because THIS? Is as cold and hard as ice is; and I
didn’t mean to cause a crisis.
But, believe me, you don’t want this heart…
It’s something I should have not let you purchase, because it looks good on the top of its
surface, but I acknowledge, it’s worthless and many women have even dropped it on purpose.
this heart was destined to die, even doctors and nurses couldn’t stop and reverse its fate; it
has…
Endured the worse of aches and was cursed to break each time I started over; I stayed “Drunk
In Love”, because whenever I thought I’d gotten sober? Cupid would run towards me, drop his
shoulder, and knock me down again; so, I’d appreciate if you placed this back in the box you
found it in and I’ll give you a refund; it’s not worth the cost you paid…
You don’t want this heart…
So, allow me to take it back, please…
And I’ll be on my way…
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